I've been here long most probably. It seems so, or it is that I'm warrior and have to deal with this task.
The weird but true fact is, that I need engative energy fro my well being. To be specific I need to balance living and tasting of both postitive and negative energy in balanced mount, that fits me.
No, I hurt no one. I do not cause anyone to suffer for my pleasure. There is good resource for those like me. Mine is computer games. My PC is full of them and they are all violent. To be true, I lick my lips, while seing my screen filled with blood, it calms me. It is good that there are such games. Many people get their needed experiences of fight without really needing to fight or endanger anyone including themselves.
I do not know how you look at it or at me now, I just lay it bare here. The games on computer are exelent thing, if you learn that it is something, that belongs only on the PC screen and nowhere else and when you find out your right mount of needed time with them. Many souls here know about suffering and are adicted to negative energy. This is great solution and should not be denied to them... OK, to us.
It is weird, who I am, I feel like so peacefull elf and yet like warrior, who can't wait to feel blood on lips again. Balancing that, however, brings peace and power, feeling of being myself in power and yet... remaining very friendly being towards others.