Cant See For The Jungle.. Then Come Into My Forest -Pt2

[ënagualí~ᏉLAᗪἇ ኔጡ።]

Cant See For The Concrete Jungle, Then Come Into My Forest..

Reflections from my work space on moving your soul forward..Pt2

Come take off those work cloths & business suits & shoes, as healing times come upon us many times in our souls life paths, when we are left to think and ponder over pasts events, choices and wrong doings over the years or decisions in need for change right now, after you acknowledge that your mind tape has beaten you on something once again..

Eventually, you will acquire enough strength and wisdom to overcome your mind tape in the areas where it presently controls you.

Have you ever felt eyes burning a hole in the back of your head?

That burning glare… that shadow you can feel behind you, but you can’t see it because every time you turn around, it’s gone? There is a forest that such a feeling inhabits. When you are in this forest, you feel this all the time.

It’s The Tao Of The Trees.

It’s the moonless sky. The starless sky. In this dark, dense, foggy forest, you can feel the stare of the trees. You can see them judging you. Evaluating you. Weighing you. And you know you will never make the trees happy. You begin to fear the trees. So you run. You find new trees. And when you do…

The trees are happy. The new trees enjoy your company. They don’t judge you, because they don’t know you. And as soon as you let down your guard, the trees begin to hate you. The glare of the shadow returns. You no longer meet the standards of the trees. Suddenly, you see trees everywhere. And then you remember:

 

It’s a forest. The trees are everywhere. And so you run. You find new trees. And once again, the trees are happy. They enjoy your company. But inevitably, the trees will judge you. And the cycle will repeat itself. Over… and over… and over.

This forest is immense. It is gigantic. It seems infinite. The only thing is, it’s not. The forest does have an end. There are paths out of the forest. But these paths are long. At times, they are downhill, and easy. It feels good to finally have found a way out. You can feel the relief of finally getting out of the forest. The freedom from judgement, from oppression  from that awful burning glare of the shadow that judges your every thought. However, as you travel this path, it begins to rise. The path becomes steeper, and steeper.

And the path itself turns from soft mossy dirt, to hard rock and roots. The rocks occasionally slice open your bare feet, and at times, the slippery wet roots provide no traction for your foot, and you painfully fall down. It is at this point, that other paths appear. In fact, other paths have always been an option. These paths are clearly defined, and nice and soft. They slope downhill, and even have clearings that are visible, areas where the trees are at a distance, and cannot judge you.

So you finally decide to take that new soft, better path. You reach that clearing, and feel at ease. The trees are at a distance. Their gaze is but a small itch in your mind. You scratch that itch, and lie down to rest. Your wounds heal. You quench your thirst with a small amount of water that flows through a tiny stream nearby. Eventually, you are well rested, healed, and satisfied. Except for one thing… that itch. You try to scratch it now, but it won’t go away. The gaze of the trees… they are still judging you. Even from the distance that they are at, their burning glare is gradually getting hotter and hotter. It is as if the clearing is getting smaller, and smaller. Until it gets to the point, that it is as if there is no longer a clearing, and you are trapped in the surrounding judging forest again.

And so you run. And as you run, you find a new path. This one is nice, soft, and simple. But as you are a traveler upon it, feeling the excitement of finally getting out of the sickening judging forest, the path becomes difficult. The jagged rocks and roots injure and trip you, as the path rises and becomes steeper and steeper. And again, you find a new path that leads to a clearing, and you take it. Again you lick your wounds, free from the trees. But again, they close in on you, causing you to run, finding new paths, taking them until it becomes too difficult, and retreating to a clearing.

And as you repeat this process over, and over, and over, the memory of the previous time haunts you, causing you to go further along the jagged path. The path slowly turns from a path, to a climb up a mountain. However, when the path becomes too difficult, you take the nice soft path again. Sadly, some do not make it out of the forest before their time is up.

However, the process begins again, when that person is reborn in the middle of the forest. The cycle begins again. Just as you were reborn in the middle of the forest. However, there is a difference. The previous run through the forest has lasting effects. When you take that path out of the forest, you follow it further. Your strength and determination to make it out was not lost. It is conserved between lifetimes.

Eventually, there is an end to the forest. It is easy to tell when you are close to escaping the forest, as the trees become less dense. Their glare feels as if you were in a clearing, but they no longer close in on you like before. The judgement is still there, but it feels as if the shadow is leaving. The path begins to level off.

The jagged rocks and roots are still there, but as you travel, you learn how to avoid the rocks and roots. You learn the way of the forest. You learn how to shut out the voices of the trees, and the burning glare of the shadow. You gain a keen instinctual sense of how the forest works. Your eyesight increases to watch for danger; your intuition heightens to tell you where water and clearings are. The path does not become easier to travel, you become more adapted to the path.

And as you travel to the end of the path, there is a road sign. The path does not simply lead out of the forest, it leads further out. The difficulty is not finding the path at this point, but having the willpower to continue to travel it, even when it appears that it is barren, and desolate. The path you have followed leads out of the forest, and into a desert. The path is still very visible, but devoid of any life. Just sand. No plants, no cacti, no animals. Just the path. As far as you can see. It is here that you live with the path you have chosen. There are no other paths through the desert. Just the one you are following now. It is not jagged, or slippery. It is not steep or rough. It is remarkably simple. Happy to be free from the oppressive forest, from the lava burning hot stare of the trees and shadow, you practically sprint down this path.

The Desert Is a Ghodsend, a Blessing.

The other paths that taunt you with their softness and ease are gone. Just this one lone path. You slow to a walk, content with your choice. The forest is now but a dot in your vision as you turn around. If you sit down, and lose your way, the road signs let you know which direction you came from, and which direction you are to go. Just the one path. No others. No distractions. Just this one lone path. You can turn back, and go back into the forest, and choose another path, if you want. Or you can keep going through this barren wasteland of a desert, with the one lone path through it. And you might even do that. You might go back, and choose a different path.

And the cycle will begin again. And you might die before you get through the desert that lies at the end of each and every path out of the forest. But the only difference is, you would just start the cycle back over again. You would feel the judgement of the trees, and hike through the forest and exit, see the road sign, sprint out of the forest, and journey along the path through the desert. But as you journey along the path through the desert, the same thing that happened in the forest happens here. You adapt to the path. You retain your keen heightened abilities you gained through the forest, but you also gain a higher sense of yourself.

The trek through the desert has forced you to be with the one person you fear the most: you. You are the only company you have, you are the only other life form on the desert path, in fact, you are the only thing that moves on the desert path. For as far as the eye can see 360 degrees around you, is just sand. But as you adapt to the path, as you adapt to being alone, the path becomes easier.

And what was once a depressing lonely trudge through endless piles of sand, becomes a walk in the park. It is here, that the end of the desert is in sight. But you don’t sprint, you don’t feel any relief in the sight of the end of the desert. In fact, you might feel bad that the desert ends. You were quite enjoying it. Once you got over the incredible loneliness, it was easy. Simple. It was a break. But as you approach the end of the desert, another feature presents itself. It is a cliff.

A Canyon.

Bigger than any other canyon, the other side is not visible. It is as if the world itself just ends. The bottom of the canyon is not visible. All you can see is the face of the cliff you stand on disappear into nothingness. Not darkness, almost just a fog. The path just ends. There is no other way to go. And you know what you have to do. Everyone knows what they have to do.

If the forest ended in a cliff, everyone would seek out another path, fearing to make the choice. The forest alone does not prepare one for making that kind of choice. That is the desert’s job. So once you reach the cliff, you feel there is no reason not to make the choice. If you walked all the way back through the infinite desert, back into the forest, leaving both would be a simple matter.

The forest would pose no threat, your keen senses would protect you. The desert would be no issue, you might actually enjoy walking through another. And you would find, as you reach the end of that other path, that it too ends in a cliff. Doing that would be simply for curiosity’s sake. However, once you reach that cliff, you have already made the choice. Reaching that cliff, the issue is not to decide, the issue is to figure out why you decided the way you did.

The issue is to find out why you make the leap of faith. That is what the cliff requires. We have all already made the choice, now we have to find out why we made the choice.

It is difficult for me to say where I am on this cycle. I feel as if I am exiting the forest, and at the same time, crossing the desert, and at the same time, deciding if I want to jump or not, and a the same time, falling.

I realise now, I am doing all of these things. There is no such concept of time in this forest. Time is relative to me, and me alone. In this journey, I am on my own schedule. If I encounter someone else, I can empathise with them. If they are in the forest, I remember how it feels to be in that forest. If they are on the desert, I too know how it feels to be in the desert, and if they are deciding to jump, I too know how that feels as well.

The thing is, we are never alone. I can leave breadcrumbs in someone’s forest. A line. A mark, A road sign. I can leave these things to help someone through their own forest, and along their own desert path. They choose whether they want to follow those crumbs or not. The help I give can even be so much as to leave someone a detailed map and compass to help them through their forest, and I can walk with someone along their desert path. But it is still their choice. I cannot take them and force them to follow the path. It is their choice every one has free will after all... And whatever they choose is of no concern to me.

It’s Their Cycle, Not Mine.

But there is something more to all of this, I can feel it. It is as if I have an O ring welded to my chest, and a steel cable is pulling me along my own path. It feels like I am being constantly inspired to write, to draw & paint, to create, to do SOMETHING!

It is as if there is a giant winch at the end of the path, standing at the edge of the cliff. It feels like my chest is about to be ripped off of my ribcage. I can resist all I want, but no matter what I do, it will always be pulling. I am in control, however. And I have to do all the work. I have to walk over broken glass and ice to get to this winch. It is not a physical pull, but a mental one. It is a calling of sorts.

A Drive.

Shamanism chooses you, not the other way around. The thing I do not know, is if everyone is chosen.

Even the feeling itself is a metaphor with libraries of information to be gleaned. It is pulling, not pushing. It is saying, “Come to me” instead of, “go that way”. It is pulling, not forcing. It is driving, not controlling. It is compelling. IT is gentle, but powerful. It is reinforcing, not degrading. It is positive reinforcement, not negative.

I know what it feels like to be on the soy sauce. It feels like a constant epiphany. It feels like you know something HUGE, but you cannot put it into words. You are aware, and cognizant of everything. Nothing escapes your gaze. Nothing escapes your awareness.

And I realise what I’ve done. I’ve made the choice. I’ve taken the leap of faith. I’ve taken the soy sauce. And I’m falling. Once you make the leap, the path takes over. You no longer work, you use your skills. You no longer force, no longer suffer from other people. The path takes over, and your skills are freed up for other things.

No matter how much I write, no matter how much I realise, there is still this sun-sized ball of epiphany that I know I know. I can feel it. It is massive. I know I know it. But the problem is, I need to know it consciously. I can feel it coming in little trickles.

Like The Drips Of a Half-open Faucet.

Falling is not a bad thing. It is simply another form of the path. It is here that the path takes over, and it guides you. You have no fear of falling. There is no fear of what lies at the end of the fall. You simply surrender yourself to the path. And that is the choice. You have to realise that it is here that you let yourself be guided by the path you have been struggling to follow. It is as if the path itself is a relationship. At first, it’s rocky and hard.

But if you stick with it, it eases up. But then, the truth of the path shows itself. It is a lot more that what it was underneath. You see the path for what it really is. And once you are comfortable with what the path is, it asks you to let it have control. The path is really yourself. At first, you fight and struggle, then you realise who you really are, and finally, you make the choice. You choose to give up control to who you really are. That is why nobody who is presented with the choice denies it.

Because at that point, you are comfortable with yourself enough to jump, rid yourself of the person you created, and surrender to who you really are. The path itself is shamanism as well. At first, it is rocky and hard. And then, you see a break as a desert, and have to come to terms with what the path really is. And finally, it asks you to surrender yourself to it, and jump. This may very well be the greatest metaphor I’ve ever written.

There are so many little details I want to add to my piece. But that is for refinement. Right now, I’m writing for myself. I wasn’t writing this to anyone else, or for anyone else.

This Was All For Me Really.

Screw everyone and how they’ll react to this, if I ever post it, but I will post it as its time to do so..

 This piece feels perfect the way it is, and as it is, it is not suitable for it to be posted on any other network sites. I feel like modifying it will degrade it. even if it may sound like I'm repeating myself in word form on every line. Even all of this part. It is all one large snapshot of me jumping. Surrendering. The metaphor itself is wonderful, and absolutely amazing.

The biggest thing I realise is that there really is no path. There never was a path, and there never will be. The entire time, the path was an illusion.

You Blaze The Path.

There are an infinite number of paths out of the forest. This means that the paths are indistinguishable from the forest itself.

"Where one person sees a path, the other sees a massive amount of jagged rocks and broken glass. Where one sees a desert path, the other sees a pile of sand".

The only thing that matters is which way we choose to go, how we adapt, and if we choose to stay on the same path or not. The other distracting paths all lead off in other directions.

I can feel the “soy sauce high” beginning to fade. But I still know there is this sun-sized ball of epiphany in here within me, waiting for me to find. However, what I also know is that the faucet is no longer dripping. The epiphanies are over just for now at least.

Now it is just time for me to simply be & just think some more & walk forwards, & maybe paint it instead...

~care to join me...

Raven Leads My Way Again..

Ꮙℓἇ∂ἇ..aka Reɪvən ღ

© - All Right Reserved

All Images google searched & belong to their respected owners, unless stated otherwise.

Part 1 can be found:-here

[Julie]

We are yes, and yes for sure those with an open heart tend to jump in or perhaps pulled in is a better term, where there's a need to be met whether it's human, animal, or any other form of life.  Touch is a good thing and touch is from the heart... I'm the same. When I was little I seemed to be told often I was too sensitive/too imaginative, all in your imagination went into adulthood too.  Yes I'm familiar with that too Vlada, I've seen it in others and myself....giving away stuff.  My thought was here that are you open to receive as well as give, balance between back and front heart chakra points.  I was described as a child as being wilful...I knew what I liked and didn't like.... that I feel is about knowing yourself.  Yes wanting folks to be happy I'm familiar with that too.  Sometimes folks like to be unhappy.  I remember a young girl online saying this to me, she liked to wallow in this state of being, she didn't want to be pulled up or out or whatever, she liked her state of being.

There's so much said online about operating from the heart, and yet it feels vulnerable and difficult at times.  

You're who you were made to be and that takes guts, nerve and a true sense of belonging to your path.  I hope this helps in some way if anyone else reads.  Authenticity is needed in this world where everyone struggles with how they should feel and how they do feel.  We are each a unique gift, an expression of life itself.

[ënagualí~ᏉLAᗪἇ ኔጡ።]

Yeah thats a good point, 'unfillable' I get that..but then I cant change who I am as a person either, as I have an open heart space that cant be closed.. We are socialised from an early age to please people so that we fit in. Be nice, don't pinch that little boy, wait your turn, say thank-you & please etc... it starts as toddlers I know my nanny was on my case all the time she had to be I was a handful as a kid, extremely needy due to being overly sensitive, plus I thrived for affection more than normal kids in the way of human touch as a coping mechanism...

I think it was tough to get it right because a lot of the time the way we express love is a direct reflection of what we were deprived of as children. So you might not recognise the damage you're doing to yourself in order to please others, in my case this was what I struggled with.. When I was younger my way of making friends was just giving them my stuff, many times Nanny had to ask the parents for my things back...Thankfully I grew out of this but as I got older I realised it was very much tied in to wanting people to like me and trying to please them in some way as I want everyone to be happy...to some degree I still like to gift people but I know what I'm doing it for these days as just simple kind hearted gifting, not wanting anything in return..it is just who I am..

[Julie]

I was so mesmerised Tara into that prolonged moment\moments over several days that I didn't even think of taking a photo and I love taking photos ;)

I can hear you Vlada, people pleasing is a hard task as you end up pleasing no person because what they want is unfulfillable, so just like I do go with what is right for you in that moment.  I've found in my "skin life" if I try and please everyone I end up being totally exhausted myself.

[ënagualí~ᏉLAᗪἇ ኔጡ።]

[People say I just don’t care but I am learning how to breathe and it’s hard to believe I never knew that before.

People say so many cruel and heartless comments but it has lead me to my garden]

Well I get people online who accuse me of the most bizarre off the wall stuff just out of the blue from nowhere. It shocks me to my core  too when it happens and I'm left standing there scratching my head thinking like WTF are u serious? why?.... it's the most bizarre situation I've ever been in.. I can't understand it, when I try to defend myself, they ignore everything I say like I never even said a response to them at all.. I ask them if they really believed that of me. I couldn't even say anything anymore, I'm left crushed and crying, yes I'm a sensitive person being I'm a full empath, I cant control my emotions... its like they accuse me of not caring enough when I've given more and more you can imagine over the years and in many websites online too...I get a feeling like I'm being used & betrayed, so my heart hurts when people do this and they dont see me for who I really am, and what I do..

I'm such a people pleaser its not funny but still it appears still thats not enough.. I then think they actually must have mental health issues not dealt with, that they are unable to see people nor for what they do, because being online they cant see the person physically and thus rely on their words only possibly some they dont understand?  or people will often live in self denial so they don't have to change. So they can hold someone else accountable to change instead of themselves. It's easier pointing the finger, shifting blame into others than taking responsibility to do what's necessary within themselves.

Some people over a long period of time can appear to be genuine - yet they are not. You will get subtle hints - I look for consistency in their behavior toward me. I do pay attention to how they treat others and their outlook or frame of reference in life..so when they turn in behaviour suddenly I'm left dumbfounded & stunned.

I then have to retreat back into nature as its my calm world, and I do forest bathing as its healing, I become more calm and serene, the soothing music of nature pushes my mind to become more stable and relaxed. The locations I got to are just awesome, beautiful, hewn beauty, alluring, swarming with nature fae orbs that surround me and connect & talk, I can't express this any better..

[Tara]

P.s. love this video thank you! 

[Tara]

I agree it is a kind of sadness to see people lost in the people world when nature is here teeming with life .  There are many more of us than it seems but we are in between the shouting matches and the noise. We are made to feel our thoughts are lesser than because they are not attached to a tag that shows our value. A friend of mine is now 100 years and she said to me everything I want is here, in her little home, the deer who come to visit her Apple tree.

People say I just don’t care but I am learning how to breathe and it’s hard to believe I never knew that before.

People say so many cruel and heartless comments but it has lead me to my garden

[Tara]

Oh I love dragonflies!  I saw so many this year!  But I was unable to get photos! Do you have photos of them? They are so pretty and the children love to see them

[Julie]

Yes if people simplify their lives then nature/natural/authenticity is what matters.  I've had some wonderful sightings of dragonflies lately, our magic.

[ënagualí~ᏉLAᗪἇ ኔጡ።]

The real conversations comes from the pure, simple and humble authentic people like myself. Those that are not connected to their cellphones glued to the ends of their finger tips, but totally with their heads & thoughts to their communities and to the Earth. I'm surrounded by people going on about Netflix TV shows, nail polish's & fake gel nails, touch rugby & Kapa Haka events, and they see nothing out in nature. Trees, to them, are only green blobs in the distance.  When I look around me, I see the magic everywhere. I stop to notice and appreciate the beauty of everything, of simply being alive and the wonder of existence... I feel at peace and utterly content when I am alone out in nature.  I also feel many people believe that answers to everything in life needs to be complex and high tech. But they don't, It's so sad to see how most folk just don't see or feel the magic...and yet some people are slowly waking up to these facts now.

[Julie]

"It’s a forest. The trees are everywhere. And so you run. You find new trees. And once again, the trees are happy. They enjoy your company. But inevitably, the trees will judge you. And the cycle will repeat itself. Over… and over… and over.".....Yes and I think this happens, it's like everyone has their own unique image of how things are, or how people should be.  It takes a strong person to be authentic because there is much judgement in this world